As we're emerging from hunkering down for winter, spring feels like a time we should spread our wings and soar! Watching all those birds flittering around and the flowers blooming should be the perfect side dish to our awakened energy and refreshed outlook on life!
What I'm actually seeing is a lot of what I like to call Mama Burnout...
We shield our eyes from the bright sun while trying to wrangle the kids into the car, make an appointment for an oil change, remember what groceries need buying to avoid melt downs, and then remembering too late that we haven't brushed our hair or changed out of our slippers yet.
All we can see is the pile of to-dos that need doing with a soundtrack of whining, fighting, and more things to add to that list. And it's not just that there are a bajillion things to do - that's #Momlife - but the burnout is that feeling that you've hit a breaking point or are approaching one so fast that you fear for what will happen at impact.
It's Mama Burnout (MBO) season and I'm pretty sure that's why Mother's Day is when it is. They could see it coming before we could. A day of pampering and thank yous and appreciation to help push aside the burnout just enough to keep us powering through!
To be clear, I don't mean that as a slight to the people who love us! They love us and they DO appreciate us and want to show us, but it's because we are such bad-a$$es that they don't even think we need the compassion, help, and thank yous most of the time. Or that it's actually all of the time. We need it all of the time. That might help us avoid the MBO.
But, we can't rely on the people around us for our happiness. They can absolutely contribute to it, but we do ourselves no favors if we are dependent on anyone else for this basic need.
And happiness shouldn't be a luxury. It is life.
So I've been working on this one for you. Here's my list of ways you can help yourself avoid or come back from your own Mama Burnout:
1. Swallow the FOMO. Hard.
I want to be with my kids and husband all the time. I really do. (Except when I don't). The second I have someone there to help manage the chaos, I love moving out of my managerial role and into my "have fun and make them laugh" role.
BUT, that person who is there to help, is there to give you a respite. Take that time and remember how good you will feel so that when you're back on duty, your mom time can include some "have fun and make them laugh" time, too.
2. Ask for help.
People can be pretty dense, and while it does sometimes feel like a loving partner, child, or friend should step in and offer help, they just may not think to do that.
You may look like you're handling it all a whole lot better than you are on the inside (definitely my problem), or you may not be responding to the subtle offers they're throwing out there to see if you want them to ask to help you. OR, more likely, they assume you'll ask.
If you need help and are having trouble getting it, consider that you could be help-blocking yourself. Need some help asking for help? Check out this blog post.
3. Take action.
Come up with a plan. Figure out what you need and make a plan to make it happen. Start small and stay steady - change doesn't happen overnight! Pick on actionable step you can take that will help. Try it and let it settle in. Then add another one.
Stick with prioritizing YOU and your needs and if doing it for YOU isn't what will keep you moving forward, do it for the happiness of the people around you. Which brings me to my last point, which should maybe be our first point of action.
4. Learn to love yourself.
If you're having trouble prioritizing you, you may want to consider the relationship you have with yourself. There is no way we can prioritize something we don't care about it. So start inside.
I always recommend beginning with short guided meditations to help you acknowledge and release your negative feelings and energy. Journaling is another powerful too.
Take time to write down (or say out loud in the mirror) ONE thing you love about yourself every day. Just like any relationship, it needs work! So don't forget to do the maintenance and to dive in and really explore the way you speak to yourself (hint: it's probably harsher than you even realize!)
Now get out there and live SAVAGE Well! As always, I'd love to hear from you! Respond here and let me know how you're doing, what you're up to and what you'd like to read more about in these newsletters!
PS. And I'm going a little crazy with a couple deals for two of my favorite populations of people so keep scrolling!
This month’s deals:
A Savage Mother's Day
Grab a spot in my next 6 Weeks to Wellness Goal Getters Group or a one-on-one package with me for some healthy life coaching for you or the special mama in your life!
Until May 13th, you can save a spot or enroll at the current price! Pricing will be going up and programming will be getting a restructuring!
Some Savage Teacher and Nurse Appreciation
Spoil your favorite teacher or nurse (or yourself!) with the gift of getting SAVAGE! This week (through Sunday), teachers and nurses get 20% off their Savage Programs (yes, including the Mother's Day deal!). Hit me up for a gift certificate or to purchase!